Excerpt from a context

Scott : Going to safeway, back in 30
Savinghinge : or i could be in a cary grant move. where i'd be saved by a beatuful woman having sex with me
Savinghinge : those old movie's were cool
Savinghinge : i've given it some thought and i've come to a conclusion
Savinghinge : i wish, i wish, i was a fish
Savinghinge : i've given it some more thought
Savinghinge : i wish, i wish, i was a dish
Savinghinge : when i have a dream. i walk around for a while and then realise that everyone else is naked. i am mortified on their behalf
Savinghinge : i am a firm believer in carbon dating. i only date women composed entirely of charcoal
Savinghinge : scott. i am secretly afraid then whenever i am alone and outside a cropduster with machineguns will swoop down and attack me. This is why i am only to be found in forests, and skulking around in a stealthy manner at that.
Savinghinge : in many way's i am similar to an underperforming company. if you were to cut me apart and sell the different piece's you would most likely make money, but commited irreparable damage to my good name.
Savinghinge : all the people would say "oh that evan, he falls apart at the slightest sign of falling profit and inept management"
Savinghinge : people alway's talk about how industry does so much damage to the environment. what they fail to mention is the legions of fanatic vegans they helped to create. it's probably a net wash.
Savinghinge : if you were to look deep into the heart of a beaurecrat, you would find a small child crying because he does not understand letters and numbers, and vehemently denying that he does not understand letters and numbers. lying constantly to cover it up.
Savinghinge : this is why forms and applications are so confusing.
Savinghinge : i only have one weakness and contrary to popular belief it is not bullets. i am impervious to all matter and can only be hurt by energy weapons
Savinghinge : however a hysterical woman generates so much energy that i must cover my eyes and flee the room. then i must spin around three times and spit, else i turn into a vampire
Savinghinge : last night i had an unpleasant dream. i was a flower and i was chatting up a very attractive lady flower. then i realised i was talking to floral wallpaper and all the other flowers laughed at me
Savinghinge : part of me wonders what you will make of all of this when you return. the far greater part of me wonders what you won't make of it
Savinghinge : when given a chance i leave message's written on windows, waiting for a cold day and a warm breath. sadly time causes most of these message's to fade away or go astray. this was only the beginning of my long standing feud with time
Scott : back
Scott : You seem to be insane, sir.
Savinghinge : ...if you were a kitchen appliance, what appliance would you be?